Saturday,

Today was a day that had more questions than answers for dealing with various side effects of the chemo Bonnie’s body continues to endure. Today really started last night and was filled with hourly activity which meant no sleep for Bonnie, unless you count 45 minute stretches without interruption, sleep. In addition to the 3 transfusions of platelets she received between 9:00 and midnight, she continued to have severe intestinal issues with bleeding, so the doctor ordered a transfusion for red blood cells which came at 4:00. In between Bonnie spiked a fever that exceeded the benchmark level which triggered an automatic chest, kidney and intestinal xray, plus blood draws off her pick line as well as direct blood draws (from a needle poke in an arm vein). Because of the transfusions, the nursing staff is required to take vitals every hour on the hour. Needless to say, Bonnie napped most of the day….something I probably should have done as well.

As troubleshooting continues on the intestinal part, we found that when Bonnie lays on her side (her favorite sleeping position) it triggers everything moving through her system quickly. If she lays on her back (in the position she has trouble sleeping in) she can go extended periods of time without having these severe bouts. We asked the doctor about why this would occur. As she examined the xray as well as Bonnie’s stomach area they starting thinking she may have a contracting bowel issue in the large intestine. Our large intestines typically contract and expand to push waste through and the school of thought is that when Bonnie is lying on her back the natural expanding and contracting ceases and once she rolls to the side it expands and thus everything runs through her quickly.

Because of this issue, the doctors ordered a CAT scan (which finally occurred this evening) of her intestinal area and have put her on a zero food/fluid intake to give her intestinal system a break. So all her nutrition is coming from IVs at this point. Unfortunately she can’t even chew and swallow ice which is a discouragement to Bonnie due to her dry mouth and throat. Also there can be no internal scopes performed on her because of not having any White Blood Cells (WBC).

Another thing we are watching is her hands. Her palms and fingers are dark red and blotchy and we’re trying to determine if this is being caused by the various hand wipes, foams and lotions we all are required to use. The thought is that maybe some of the chemicals are too harsh for Bonnie’s skin to handle because of the low platelets and zero WBC. Or is it a reaction to one of the antibiotics or something else she is receiving.

For tonight and tomorrow, please pray specifically for the following:
1) That her bowel will start to function again with normal contractions and expansions (assuming we have the correct diagnosis)
2) That she will be able to find enough moisture from chewing the ice and spitting it out to give her dry mouth relief
3) That her hands won’t dry out and crack putting her at risk of infection
4) That the internal bleeding will stop
5) That her blood and key nutrients will begin to increase on its own without supplements to an acceptable standard level

With all this, Bonnie still has her smile which radiates a warmth. Even though she physically is not the same on the outside or on the inside due to the treatment of this disease, her spirit is unchanging. Sure there are times she is discouraged and I assure her it is okay to be discouraged. As we talk through it though, she asks me to read her Bible verses and a glow of peace comes across her face. One of her 3 x 5 note cards has Philippians 4:7:

“And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your mind in Christ Jesus.”

Her comment she wrote to accompany this verse is:

“If we make the choice to pray instead of worry we will experience God’s peace”

Bonnie’s statement sounds easy, but every hour with this battle brings a new twist, a new prognosis and “worry” finds a way to slowly drift in like a low lingering fog. If we don’t use the power of prayer, that fog will sock in so thick we will be subjecting ourselves to feeling a false sense of aloneness and abandonment and a loss of focus or vision, which should be on Jesus. Prayer unleashes God’s abundant peace such that we cannot begin to understand and it is that peace which dissipates the fog of “worry” that deceptively wants slowly creep in distracting us from our relationship with God. Please pray that the winds of God’s peace will keep clear the fog of Satan’s worry as we strive to endure in the battle.

We are so encouraged by all the notes and cards that let us know you are praying.

Thank you so much.